A widower can be still married in his mind, often feeling guilty, as if he is cheating on his beloved, deceased wife. Widowers can have wonderful qualities, if you are able to wait it out.As the new woman, you want a man who will see you for yourself, as an equal partner, not as a “mistress” he feels guilty about. It takes some time for a widower to deal with the loss of his wife and be able to accept another. But if you are expecting something to develop faster, and if you have expectations of coupling with gusto, your plans may end up in sadness. A woman must carefully evaluate the qualities of a widower and then talk to him openly about her needs.This type of man may have a hard time with the thought of a girlfriend or future wife.What about the widower who keeps his late wife’s clothes, phone messages, and pictures all around?
If this advice sounds negative, it is only meant to provide women with a jolt of realism, and to provide widowers with an eye-opener.
I do not doubt that many women DO ask these questions and that people are confronting some difficult situations with this "baggage." But emotionally unavailable men come in many flavors. I married a divorced man and we spend more time dealing with his feelings about his 23-year marriage disintegrating and their divorce than we do with Gavin almost literally disintegrating before my eyes and his death. (Plus we live in their house but dude, I KNOW that's weird, and it was equally my choice.) People "compare" me to Mr.
And it seems too easy to me to provide advice to women who are dating... What makes widowed men so much more "difficult" to deal with than, say, divorced men? (Although the score does even out a bit if you start counting the time I spend on managing his posthumous career as an artist and the fact that I spend tons of time on volunteer work for widowed people like Widowed Village and the Soaring Spirits board. Fresh's first wife all the time, and they compare him to Gavin all the time, but kindly, and without excessive characterization. As stated in many examples above, divorced men do not tend to have fond memories of their ex-wives.
To me, the Dating a Widower movement, such as it is, looks like it's just based on following Google to high readership.
Just because people ask a question, doesn't mean there is a substantive answer to be found...